“I open my eyes, I try to see, but I’m blinded by the white light…”
Here we go. Boys and girls, I’d like to take you back to a hilarious and also very bleak, bleak time of my life – when Simple Plan ruled supreme in the pop charts. For those of you who were blissfully unaware at the time, Simple Plan were a group of whiny Canadian kids who hit the big time with singles like Shut Up and Welcome to My Life, as well as the horrid angst anthem Perfect (“I’m sorrrryyyy/I can’ttttt beeeee/perrrrrfeccccttt!”) Definitely the second worst song with Perfect in the title ever.
Anyways, after touring with Green Day and pissing off anyone with half a brain, they decided to release this final single off Still Not Gettin’ Any. You can already tell how fucktarded they are from the get go by saying that the song is Untitled and then GIVING IT A FUCKING TITLE. But, naturally, it gets worse – this one’s all about moping in the rain, slow-motion crying and the sappiest “nooo bby plz dnt g0000” scenes you were ever likely to find around that time in a video. Holy fucking hell do the waterworks fly in this one. It’s inescapable! Not to mention old mate Pierre Bouvier (pictured above) randomly interjecting footage of himself having a whinge about some first-world tragedy that he probably blogged about on LiveJournal and told all his friends on VampireFreaks about. Oh yeah, I’m going with some ANCIENT online references, get at me!
In conclusion, this one is quite literally like a car crash. It’s also hilariously bad. What a bunch of clowns these guys were. Watch this if you want to remember some hideous faux-angst from the mid-2000s. You don’t? Good child.