Watch This if You Dare: Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull – “On the Floor”

“That badonka donk is like a trunk full of bass on an old school Chevy…”

WARNING!

WARNING!

JENNIFER LOPEZ IS ATTEMPTING A COMEBACK.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

I REPEAT.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

Okay, gang, we’ve been in this situation once before – if I can cast your minds back to about 2004, with that annoying saxophone riff and the video with her playing all the different versions of herself. Get Right, I think it was called? Remember it? Yeah, hardly. Dropped off the face of the earth shortly after hitting the top twenty, and the world was glad to be rid of her. I was willing to let her return to the public eye via being a new judge for American Idol slide – but only on the basis that there would be no new material. Such a fool was I to think it wouldn’t happen!

This is essentially a midlife crisis in video form. J. Lo, at 41, is trying to act like a queen of the club, as well as half her age. Neither works – not even with a beat from RedOne. REDONE! He can make anyone sound like the future of dance music – what the hell? A cheesy cameo from Pitbull doesn’t assist anybody with his turgid bullshit, either. Essentially, it’s just a lot of J. Lo looking longingly into the camera lens, throwing off the same dancemoves she’s been doing since If You Had My Love and, at the lowest point, wearing what appears to be a silver mirrorball jumpsuit. Who thought that was a good idea?

Anyway, J. Lo’s back and I’m really sorry that you had to find out this way.

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One response

  1. […] that says about either of us, really. Anyway, let’s get on to the matter at hand. Remember the last time we covered a video by these two, and I mentioned that J-Lo was – for lack of a better term – pretty much too old for […]

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