Watch This If You Dare: Taking Dawn – “The Chain”

“If you don’t love me now, you will never love me again…”

So. Welcome to another week of videos. Here’s what I knew about Taking Dawn before I watched this video.

1. Nothing, and
2. They cover Fleetwood Mac songs. Possibly badly? Who knows.

Now, here’s everything that I have learned from watching this video.

Taking Dawn are douchebags. Gargantuan, epic, unbelievably huge douchebags. They have long, stupid hair, they wear “classic rawk” shirts (with the sleeves ripped off!) and they seem to have incredibly high opinions of themselves. I know I’d think I was pretty awesome if my lead guitarist looked like Billy Ray Cyrus.
Taking Dawn ruined this song. During the verses, it’s a redneck-country stomp with weak, glossy production; and when the chorus hits it sounds like Avenged Sevenfold taking a shit. Don’t even get started on the guitar solo at the end. Good lord.

Half of this video is the band recording the song in the studio, which is enough to make you want to punch their faces in. The other half, however, just gets you stabby – they goof around like douches backstage at a show before a montage of rawkin’ out, playing guitar solos, scoring with chicks and SOMEONE GETTING A TAKING DAWN TATTOO. I AM NOT KIDDING. YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS PART OF THE VIDEO FOR YOURSELF. FUCKING CAPS. It’s insufferable douchiness, and only one band could possibly do it worse – that’s right, we’re going to watch a bit of Hinder tomorrow. Looking forward to it? I’m not.


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