Watch This If You Dare: Scarlett Belle – “Closure”

“This heartbreak is giving me closure…”

Okay, I couldn’t help myself. You’re getting yourself a double dose of Tamara Jaber-related atrocity, following my blog of her work with Scandal’Us – this meat is considerably fresher, but tastes just as awful. Meet Scarlett Belle, a duo formed by Jaber and former Idol contestant Reigan Derry (or Derpy as I’ve taken to calling her).  Just when we thought we were safe from the ex-Mrs. Sandilands, this shit goes and happens. For fuck’s sake!

This time around, not only is the music terrible, but it’s borderline-plagiaristic, too. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding – IT IS PLAGIARISM. Both Jessica Mauboy and Keri Hilson should contact the lawyers – the former for the vocal stylings and melodies from a string of her best-known singles, the latter for the beat of the song which directly rips off her hit Knock You Down with Kanye West and Ne-Yo. I know it sounds like every time one of these blogs comes up I hate everything involving Australian pop music, but it’s fucking bullshit like this that gives me reason to.

Onto the video, and things aren’t much better. Occasionally, they’re actually worse – Jaber and Derpy spend most of their time fluttering about a variety of poorly-shot and artificial-looking locations, with Jaber especially continuing her own personal fixation on her tits in a variety of skimpy retro-fuck clothing items. What’s the go here – have they both left the same dude to be with one another? Is this some kind of T.a.T.u.-esque publicity stunt? Also, watch near the very very end of this video (like 3:30/3:35) for a bizarre “subtle” advertising plug for something called a Mino HD. Anyone?

In the end, it appears the only people thinking that they’re hot shit are the two girls themselves. And, Derpy, what the fuck? Weren’t you the one who sang Karnivool on Idol? That was awesome! Why in God’s name would you even consider wasting your time here? Ian Kenny should fart in your mouth and shit all over your bedroom walls.

In conclusion, Libya is a land of contrast. And though I’m not normally one for censorship, someone needs to stop Tamara Jaber from ever making any kind of music or music video ever, ever again. Need moar proof? Of course you fucking do – next week I’m going for the triple threat with Tamara’s Ooh Ahh video. My hatred will boil over and melt everything it touches. You WILL want to be around to see it.

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2 responses

  1. I actually thought they were really decent. Tamara is gorgeous and Teagan is also. I would like to hear you sing 🙂

  2. Looks =/= good music.

    If you’d like to hear me sing, go to http://www.facebook.com/nothingrhymeswithdavid
    My EP is up for streaming.

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