The Cringe: East 17 – “It’s Alright”

“Don’t you worry, ’cause it’s alright/Don’t you worry, child of the night”

Welcome to our first installment of The Cringe, and what better way to start than mainstream pop of the early nineties. Oh my, what a wasteland we find ourselves in here – particularly in terms of music videos. Still feeling the aftershock of the eighties and yet still trying to path the way to “the future”, early nineties pop was between a rock and a hard place. This is especially evident in this smash hit single by English boy band East 17. Remember the boy-band? Oh my, what crazy days.

So the first thing you’re going to notice about this video is the fashion. The hideous, what-were-they-thinking fashion. It all starts around the fifteen second mark, where we catch the first glimpse of the group’s lead singer, Brian Harvey. Now, the dude is obviously a fucking idiot – in a later stage of his career, he would RUN OVER HIMSELF WITH HIS OWN FUCKING CAR. But for now, he’s just making tragic mistakes of wearing clothes and accessories such as these in public. Check out that beige vest! Those hoop earrings! And how about that awful beanie on his head that stretches above and beyond his thick skull? Good lord. Doubt there’s a better definition of “it seemed like a good idea at the time” in terms of 1993. Maybe Billy Ray Cyrus’ mullet, but that’s about it.

What else is there that makes this one worthy of The Cringe? Gee, how about the horrid choreography – they are about as flexible as a Lego man and their dance moves reflect this tenfold. Not to mention the other three monkeys in the band are vying for Harvey’s position of worst-dressed. The hats! Who MADE these things? And we haven’t even mentioned the generic big performance stage with all the girls pissing their panties over the fact that East 17 are “in da house”. Congrats, gents, you have truly made yourselves worthy of Y,WGAV!’s first ever Cringe.

Oh, and apparently they’re getting back together this year? PLEASE. GOD. NO.

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